HOMOPHOBIC COMMENTS ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE?

One week ago I posted an engagement session here on my blog (you can read the post clicking here) and on social media. And people loved it. The couple is really happy with the images and so am I.

 

Jamie and Nick's post is now LIVE on my BLOG. What a lovely couple! Hope you like it as much as I do! #couple #london #love #lovestory

Posted by Manu Mendoza Photography on Friday, 27 November 2015

The thing is that I suddenly received a notification on my phone from the Facebook Pages app, notifying me that somebody commented on my post. So, I grabbed my phone expecting to see a lovely comment saying how stunning the couple look or something like that. However, I would had never imagined what I was about to read...

Oh please....I just don't get why you would share shit like this....???

To be honest I was shocked. At the beginning I thought, well... maybe this person doesn't like the images. Could be, could't it? As I don't want to reveal this person's identity (at least on this post) even though he/she commented on my public Facebook Page, let's call him/her Marmalade for example.

So, as I'm always trying to improve I thought, let's ask Marmalade what she exactly means. Maybe she means that my style is horrendous, or maybe she hates London...who knows? So I asked her:

Excuse me Marmalade? What do you exactly mean? 

So I had to wait until the next morning to know what Marmalade had to say... and it wasn't nice:

You must be thick if I have to spell it out to you.

Getting better... and yes, I must be thick because I didn't understand what was going on. Well, obviously I was aware of what Marmalade was trying to say but even nowadays I don't expect this kind of comments. So, I tried to control myself and I replied again:

Yes Marmalade, probably I'm really thick to understand the problem here... could you shed some light on this?
homophobic-comments-iphone.jpg

Although I was expecting some light on the mysterious problem that Marmalade had with my post I never received more comments from her.

One day later a woman contacted me through Facebook Messages on my Facebook Page. She liked my page days before all of this happened and as she said on the message, she is a relative of Marmalade. She was mortified with Marmalade's behaviour. She apologised for the comments of her relative and she also said that Marmalade is very old fashioned and opinionated. So I thanked her for that, I truly appreciated it. She also asked me if I could delete Marmalade's comments as they weren't nice and I replied that I would probably do so. However, after almost a week from the incident I've thought twice and I'm not gonna delete them. Why? Well, I believe in freedom of speech and I like to listen to different opinions. But at the same time I think we all must have empathy for each other. I try to put myself under Marmalade's skin and I can't find the need to comment on a public page trying to undermine or offend someone's feeling. Having said that it's something that you can see everywhere nowadays. People hiding behind a computer or a phone, aka trolls. So, if Marmalade didn't have a problem posting those comments on a public page why should I delete them?

On the other hand, to be fair I can't affirm that the comments were homophobic (that's why I use a question mark on the tittle of this post), because Marmalade didn't literally say something against the fact that the images are from a gay couple. However, I think it's obvious. 

The funny turn to the story is the fact that I'm gay as well. Yes, but I don't like to say it as if I were wearing a tag on my neck. I don't like tags, I'm just a person who loves and at the same time I'm fortunate to be loved by an amazing person. To me it doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman... love doesn't have anything to do with gender. Love is a feeling that we all have and share.

Anyway, I was sad because I have one of the most beautiful jobs. Photographing LOVE stories is something that I do love and I'm so proud of it. Being a witness of so much love is unbelievable. And having this type of person commenting against love makes me sad. In fact, makes me sad to know that there are people out there so unhappy and sad that they don't have better things to do... poor you.

MY RESPONSE TO THE COMMENTS

Well Marmalade, I think you're just afraid to express what you meant publicly... but let me say something to you:

 

  1. This is MY Facebook page therefore, I share whatever I want whenever I want. I don’t expect you to get it though.
  2. If you want to be loved, love. Love is not only for people like you. Actually you’re not showing much love with your words… only hate.
  3. You work or worked for the Metropolitan police. I thought the Metropolitan police has to protect people, not to harass people.
  4. If you don’t like what you see I don’t know why you are wasting your precious time commenting here.
  5. Respect people, love them and be happy.
  6. Get a book or two.
  7. What made you exactly say that? Maybe you don’t have something as beautiful, envy?
  8. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to help you with that. I only work with nice people, people who worth it. I believe in love, in pure love and I live to photograph LOVE stories. And I don’t care who they are, their religion, where they come from or if they are straight, gay, lesbian or transgender. Who do you think you are to judge?
  9. Go back to your family and take care of them. Love them as if today were the last day with them. Teach your children to respect and to love no matter what.
  10. Above all, be a happy person. I wish you the best and I hope you could reconsider what you said.

Manu xx


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